Notes From A Massage Classroom

A few tidbits from my day.

 

On Punctuality:

At 9:00 a.m. I only had 10 of my 24 students in class on time.  I commented about how difficult is was being an adult and getting out of bed in the morning, mocking the plight of my students, and two of them responded:

“I like learning, I just don’t like coming to school.”

To which I replied:

“That’s funny, because I love school but I hate my students.”

And for the next five minutes I wouldn’t let any of them talk or make eye contact with me.

On why it’s NEVER okay to have fun in class:

One of my students was late because her train had hit a pedestrian.  The class had maintained a relatively silly vibe until that moment, and me, not being able to read vibes very well, had the grand insight to say when she walked in the door:

“Oh wow, did you see it?”

And she immediately teared up, nodding vigorously, and said:

“Like four times.  The train kept going past him.”

And then she ran out into the hallway in full on meltdown.  Luckily my TA went into the hall to calm her down, and she came back into class not much later.

I’m still looking for the right moment to apologize. ***

On Piriformis:

Things you find yourself saying to grown adults when working on piriformis syndrome.

“Let’s stop talking about twerking, guys.”

“Don’t refer to his glutes as man buns.”

“No, that is not what she said.”

“Moana is much better than Frozen.”

Teaching tip: Students of all ages will literally wear themselves out talking about their favorite Disney movie.  I brought it up during some general low back work, and by the time they got to the posterior hip they were fairly silent.  At least for a little while.

“Seriously, stop talking about twerking!”

On Hamilton:

In my second class I have one student named Alexander, and one named Angelica.  I have to constantly stop myself from telling her:

“Don’t try to take a bite of him!”

I have the honor to be your obedient servant.

-J. Von

 

***Update: We cool now.

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